transformations

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It is an age-old question:  before the world came into being, what was there?  Another world?  Something non-physical?  Nothing?

When I became a dad I began to understand this question more deeply.  For my daughter Olivia, my wife and I are the first people she looks to — a reference point, if you will — to define who she is.  What answer do we give her?  More than anything I want to tell her in words and actions that she is loved; that she has a place in this world, a role to fill.  Her life has meaning.

But what is my reference point?  What do I look to to explain what I’m doing here?

There was something formless and perfect
before the universe was born.
It is serene. Empty.
Solitary. Unchanging.
Infinite. Eternally present.
It is the mother of the universe.
For lack of a better name,
I call it the Tao.

Wow, ok.  There’s a lot there.  How does that description relate to my Christian understanding of God?

Most people like to say that monotheists believe in a personal creator-god, while eastern spirituality posits an impersonal origin, often described as an ‘energy’ or ‘force’.  I reject this dichotomy.

Here’s a question:  what are you?  A personal being, or impersonal?  You know that you are different from a rock or a drop of water.  You are a person.  At the same time, every thought you have is the result of electrical currents in your brain; every movement and action you take is the result of the interaction between your tissues and organs, most of which you’re not even aware of.  So you are also a complex combination of impersonal forces.

If we are both personal and impersonal, why shouldn’t God be?

Many Christians will doubtless find this description of Tao uncomfortable next to the familiar grandfather or ‘Jesus-is-my-boyfriend’ stereotypes.  Yet it is eerily similar to the opening words of Genesis:  ’The earth was formless and empty, and darkness covered the deep waters. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the surface of the waters.’ Beautiful.

For all the Tao’s supposed impersonality, I find myself trying to emulate it more and more.  I want serenity.  I want emptiness.  I want to be completely present.  Moreover, I find that these qualities enhance the personality of those who adopt them, in the same way that a child emulates its parents.

Asking where we came from is not just a pointless question for philosophical geeks.  It gives us a roadmap for living.  As Paul said, ‘… in him we live and move and have our being.’ Lao Tzu agrees, saying of the Tao,

It flows through all things,
inside and outside, and returns
to the origin of all things.